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Tuesday, January 14, 2014

daily food tracking is hard...

I really need to make it a priority so it is the first thing I do when I sit down a the computer before I get sucked into other things.  It is now time for bed, and food tracking feels like a chore.

It has been a crazy day...Gonz's school was closed due to ice melting on the mountain roads, making picking up many of the kids in outlying areas impossible.  Jos had school AND he was Mr. movie star today as the Center for Disabilities was doing a piece on him for their telethon, so they followed him around this morning, and then I went down for an interview with them this afternoon.  I am looking forward to seeing the finished piece.  Josiah is such a charismatic little guy, they loved working with him and he is so excited that he is going to be on TV soon.

I had to drop Gonz off at my dad's house, so he got to hang out with Grandpa and played video and computer games most of the day, so it was a no electronics evening for the kids, as Gonzo had more than enough during the day and Josiah lost his electronics privileges due to out of control behavior at AWANA last night.  They played with match box cars, did hide and seek, and had a lot of other fun instead.  We also enjoyed Tacos for dinner, with whole wheat and whole corn tortillas.

I made tacos because Jules loves tacos, but she did not want to eat with us...she is now a couple of days without a drink, so is feeling it.  Fighting any addiction is hard, AND changing a long standing habit is hard, so her evening was challenging.  But she made it through, and went to bed early, around 7:30, which is not that early as she gets up for work at 4:30, so had already had a long day.  I am just grateful that she chose to battle her demons and to overcome this part of her life that has held her back from being who she really is and really living a full life.  I am glad too that she chose a path that we can continue to walk together.  I just could not handle living with an active alcoholic, I have been there and done that, and promised myself and my kids we would never live that chaos again.  It is hard enough to live a happy and stable life when you live on so little money facing so many challenges that special needs brings.  To add the layer of an addictive partner to it puts it over the top.  I know it is crazy, and I had not realized how much of an issue she had with alcohol before she moved in, but I had finally realized I could no longer live with the unpredictability and uncertainty of it all.  I know we are still in a rocky area, I know that overcoming this for her will be a hung step, and I know that it may still end with having to part ways, which hurts me at a soul level.  but living with eh addictive presence in the household will hurt my kids on many more levels.  So waffles before beer....a motto I have been working on adopting to remind me to keep my priorities straight.

But, over all, i had a busy day and evening, and forgot to track my food...
need to work on making that a bigger priority!  At least I got a blog post in!

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